


Kremquisition Collection

by fatale_distraction



Series: Prompts [3]
Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Cunnilingus, Domestic Fluff, Drabble Collection, Enthusiastic Consent, Explicit Sexual Content, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Fluff and Smut, Humor, Semi-Public Sex, Teasing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-03-18
Updated: 2017-04-17
Packaged: 2018-10-07 00:28:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 6,975
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10348275
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fatale_distraction/pseuds/fatale_distraction
Summary: A collective of prompts I've received for Kremquisitor over on tumblr. Mostly DWC prompts.





	1. Reckless

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The relief of fatalistic recklessness - Krem x Lavellan  
> No bears were actually injured during the writing of this drabble

Krem could not fucking believe it. He could not believe he had let the Inquisitor talk him into one of Sera’s inane pranks, and he could not believe she had convinced him to wake the proverbial dragon with a stick to the eye.

The dragon in this case being a shaggy, half-ton bear, which was currently lumbering down a steep hill after them, leaving rotten logs crushed into mulch in her wake while bellowing with thunderous anger at them. The Inquisitor didn’t seem to notice their impending doom, flying fleet-footed next to him and laughing with reckless, and possibly brainless, abandon.

This is it, he thought. After all the ridiculous assignments he’d taken on, the spiders, the giants, the spiders, this was how he was going to die. Mauled to death by a very sleepy bear. At least it wasn’t the squirrels…

The bear uttered another furious roar that shook the ground beneath their feet. Camp was in sight. Krem prayed. He prayed this stupid plan worked, he prayed Cassandra was as strong as she appeared, and he prayed for Sera to meet as painful and gory a death as he was very likely about to face. A low hanging branch caught him across the face, but he shook it off, adding it to a list of grievances he would submit to Josephine if he survived the day. He could tend to the scratch later, when a bear wasn’t literally breathing down his collar.

“Cassandra, help!” shrieked the Inquisitor with an inappropriate level of glee as they burst through the foliage and into camp.

“What in the Maker’s name–?!” the Seeker cried, her hand going instinctively to her sword belt. Her fingers closed over empty air. She looked down in angry disbelief, then back up as the bear broke through into the clearing. Lavellan slid behind her for cover, Krem hot on her tail. Shamelessly, he crouched behind the Inquisitor. This was her idea, she could be the one to be eaten first. “Damnit, Sera!”

The bear bore down on them. Cassandra made an angry growl deep in her throat and brought her arm back, dealing a powerful, stinging blow squarely into the bear’s nose. The poor, angry thing roared in pain, rubbing a giant clawed paw at her muzzle. She took one look at Cassandra, bristling with her arm drawn back for another hit, and thought better of it. With a threatening rumble, the bear turned and ambled away, complaining with bitter wails and whines.

“Sera!!” shouted Cassandra. She whirled on Krem and the Inquisitor, eyes aflame. Lavellan had collapsed across Krem’s lap, laughing hysterically. “I’ll deal with you imbeciles later. Stay put,” she ordered before tearing off into the trees, following the sound of Sera’s ugly laughter, echoing somewhere ahead.

“You…owe me…” panted Krem. Lavellan was still giggling helplessly, sprawled over his legs.

“So worth it,” she gasped, hugging her stomach, mirthful tears streaking her cheeks. “Did–did you see her f-face?! And the bear! She punched it! R-right in the s-s-snoot!” she dissolved into another fit of laughter, slapping at her knee.

Krem couldn’t help but laugh along with her, adrenaline still surging through him in a giddy rush. “She’s…she’s going to murder Sera…” he choked.

“I know!” wailed the Inquisitor, rolling.

They laughed until they were once again breathless, drawing long gasps of air into their tired, burning lungs. Krem’s legs ached and there was a sharp stitch in his side. He could feel dried blood on one cheek where he’d ran into a branch. Lavellan hadn’t fared much better. There were twigs in her hair, her pretty face covered in hairline scratches, and she was still convulsing with laughter, complaining that her stomach hurt she was laughing so hard. Krem lay back against the dirt, letting her roll across his legs as she pleased, just elated that they had pulled it off.

“She punched a fucking bear…” he mused. Lavellan shrieked with more laughter, slapping at him and clutching between her thighs.

“Shut uuuup!!” she squealed, face flushed. “I’m gonna pee!”

“Not on me please.”

 **“STOOOOP!”** she laughed.


	2. Krem Kisses

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The prompt was 'Krem Kisses'  
> I delivered.

Your worship.

Ellana was so completely, entirely one hundred percent fed up with that title. “Herald of Andraste”. What in Elgar’nan’s name would it take to convince everyone that not only did she not believe in the Maker, OR the divinity of Andraste, but that she barely believed in her _own_ pantheon? At this point, taking the Creators’ names in vain was more of a cultural habit than anything. 

If she heard ‘your worship’ one more fucking time…

She stormed into the Herald’s Rest, beelining for Cabot’s counter, where he wisely already had her usual waiting; a juniper infused liqueur with bubbly elderflower wine and a twist of lime. Sweet, heady, and guaranteed to knock the inexperienced drinker on their ass. 

She commandeered a corner table to herself and sipped at her drink with a sour face. Stupid _shems_. Acting like the Chantry told the only truth in Thedas, as if anything even remotely miraculous must be due to divine intervention. Sometimes the miraculous was just dumb stupid luck. ‘Your Worship’, indeed. The only thing she’d done lately worthy of worship was not to scream out loud at how many people insisted she was something she wasn’t, so smug, as if they surely knew better than her simple, bumpkin, Dalish ass.

“Your worship!”

“WHAT?” Ellana snapped, whirling on the unfortunate fool behind her. As soon as her eyes met his, she wilted. An embarrassed flush spread over her face, tinting her cheeks, her nose, the tips of her pointed ears. She could even feel the heat of shame spreading down her chest. 

“I…just wanted to see how you fared…” Cremisius faltered, with a good-natured, if awkward chuckle. 

Ellana took a deep breath and sighed. “Sorry…” she mumbled, downing the rest of her drink. “It’s been…strange.” 

“How so?”

The Inquisitor, now that was a title, looked around the bar. It was crowded at this time of night, plenty of off-duty soldiers taking the chance to loosen up and flirt with the tavern wenches. She jerked her head toward the back door, and the pair of them slipped out, drinks still in hand. 

Once they were outdoors, the frigid wind biting through the light leathers they wore within the protection of Skyhold’s walls, Ellana went on, leaning against a slapdash fence. “It was difficult enough when everyone only though I was the Herald…now that I’m the Inquisitor…” She shook her head with a rueful grimace. “No matter what I do, everyone thinks I’m some holy idol to be worshipped…and I’m sick of it. I’m Dalish for fuck’s sake!” She exclaimed. “I only worship my own gods out of habit! I don’t even believe in the Maker!”

She had expected a painful silence, but Krem only laughed, loud and uninhibited. 

“Well, that’s leadership for you, isn’t it?” He slapped his thigh with a jovial chuckle. “Everyone thinks you’re something you’re not. Even the Chargers think I can just pull a miracle out of my ass, and I’m not even supposed to be divinely appointed.”

Ellana groaned and let her head drop into her arms, braced against the fence. “I just wish everyone would stop calling me ‘your worship’ all the time. I’m a failure of a hunter within my own clan! Not some idol to be paid homage to…”

“But you are,” Krem protested, sobering even as he took another swig of his ale. “You’re the only one who can close the tears in the Veil. You fought off a dragon long enough for everyone in Haven to retreat. You saved countless lives, including mine…” He shook his head in disbelief, his voice cracking. “You…are the most incredible woman I have ever met. Can you imagine how you seem to others? You may as well be Andraste reborn. You fought a DRAGON. The Chief has sex dreams about fighting a dragon, and you did it for real!”

“I’m not Andraste!” shouted Ellana, throwing her glass to the ground. It shattered on the icy pavement as she rounded on the hapless Krem, whose dark brows shot skyward at her outburst. “I’m just some stupid elf who got tossed into a shite position that no one else wanted because I was useless to my clan, and because I’m so fucking useless, I ended up in a stupid fucking position at the wrong stupid FUCKING time and now everyone thinks I’m divine! Well guess what, I’m not. I just SUCK! That is literally the only reason I was at the Conclave when I was! I ended up where I did because I was LATE. Because my stupid arse snapped a bowstring halfway to the shrine, not even fighting anything, but because I TRIPPED. Over NOTHING.”

With each infuriated exclamation, she took a step forward, until she had crowded poor Cremisius against the back wall of the tavern and was jabbing a finger at his chest, so engulfed in her own fury that she’d forgotten why she was so upset in the first place. She found herself centimeters from him, glaring up at him with tears streaming down her cheeks.

Then she was in his arms. His mouth was on hers, snapping hungrily at her lips, pressing her hard against his chest and groaning into her mouth without a care for who might hear. Her tongue met his stroke for stroke, her fingernails scraping through the velvety soft down at the base of his neck. A strong hand found her thigh and urged her leg up over his hip. She gasped against his lips at the sudden friction between her legs when his hips rolled against hers. 

“If you call me…” she panted between crazed kisses. “Your worship…one more time…”

“You’ll what?” he breathed, taking her bottom lip between his teeth and savoring the long, low moan he drew from her throat. 

“I’ll kick your ass…” Her fingers tangled into the longer hair atop his head and pulled firmly. 

His voice shattered on a gasp as his hips jerked against hers. He tried to pull back–he hadn’t even told her yet– but her leg held him captive, her arms encircling his neck as she stole thirsty kisses from his thick, willing lips. He finally broke apart, dragging air into his lungs with a heaving chest. 

“Your–um…” he panted, trying desperately to pretend like he hadn’t engraved her first name into his mind the first time he’d laid eyes on her.

“Ellana,” she whispered, sending shivers down his spine. 

“Ellana…” Krem melted into her arms, nuzzling into the hollow of her shoulder. He held her firm against his chest, wracked with gasping breaths as he came down from the high of her touch. “Ellana…”


	3. Kramps

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> DWC Prompt: The jittery, sick feeling when you can’t do anything, with Krem.  
> TW: crampy!Krem  
> As always, I try to approach my writings with Krem with as much sensitivity and respect as I possibly can. If you are bothered by anything I write, or have comments, concerns, or questions, PLEASE do not hesitate to message me and we can talk about ways I can improve! :)

“Ugh.”

Krem rolled over, dragging the covers over his head as he went, curling himself into a tight cocoon. Dalish had left him with a small, round stone a little larger than his palm that stayed nice and warm, even during the coldest winters. She insisted she’d bought it, not enchanted it herself. Krem would have called bullshit, but even the effort to open his mouth was too much at the moment.

He was in so much pain he couldn’t move, couldn’t think, couldn’t eat. His body was quaked from the deep, raw ache and from the emptiness in his stomach. He just curled around the blessedly warm stone and hoped he’d fall asleep soon.

The door swung open with a creak. He peeked over his shoulder with bleary eyes and saw the Inquisitor standing in the doorway looking concerned and carrying a tray with soup and tea, steaming in the chilly mountain air that seeped into the room through the cracks in the windows. 

“The Chargers asked me to look in on you while they’re out,” she explained with a quiet, gentle voice as she carefully shut the door with a bump of her hip. 

Krem grumbled unintelligibly and wrapped himself up more tightly. His eyes were red, with puffy bruised circles under them, his hair was a sweaty, matted mess, his binder was on the other side of the room…the last thing he needed was the Herald of Andraste seeing him looking like a hot mess. Especially when she looked so lovely, the gentle drape of her simple, linen gown framing her ample hips so perfectly, her hair aflame in the afternoon light streaming through the dusty windows. 

He heard her set the tray down nearby. A cool hand slipped under the covers, felt his forehead, the side of his neck. He breathed out a grateful moan and leaned into the touch, protesting when she drew the hand away and turned back to the tray. 

“Sit up and drink this,” she was saying. He made an angry, garbled noise and drew the covers tighter over his head. “It will help!” Her hands dug at the thick quilt and pulled. She was strong for such a tiny elf, but Krem was stronger. She stumbled back when her fingers slipped on the fabric and huffed, her hands on her hips. “You won’t sit up, but you’ve got the energy for a tug of war…”

Tiptoeing, she went around to the end of the bed, eased the edge of the quilt up, then dove in before he could stop her. Krem flailed and shouted while she slithered up and sat on his stomach, tearing his cocoon down from the inside out. Her weight settled nicely onto his abdomen, warm and heavy, and he stopped squirming for a moment. Now that was nice. He pulled a pillow over his sweaty face, but let her stay. The pressure of her eased some of the pain spasming through his middle and down his legs. He sighed with relief.

Ellana tutted at him and leaned over to grab the tea. Krem peeked out from behind the pillow and was greeted with an up close encounter with a very lovely set of breasts. “Drink,” she demanded, leaning back, cup in hand. Krem covered his face again, moaning. He hadn’t eaten in so long, the thought of swallowing anything was making him ill.

Not to be deterred, the young woman tore the pillow from his grasp and slipped a cool hand beneath his neck. Whining, protesting with words slurred by pain and lethargy, he took a tentative sip. The tea was strong, bitter, and cloyingly sweet. He coughed.

“It’s raspberry, ginger, fennel, and honey,” she explained at the angry look of betrayal on his face. “It doesn’t taste good, but it will help the pain and inflammation. Trust me.” She smiled, sweet and kind. Not at all like the foul tea, which he choked down another mouthful of. Some of the pain and trembling began to ease and he sighed in relief. 

“I’m hungry…” he rasped, voice hardly there at all. 


	4. Hold Still

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Received two requests for the prompt: "Hold Still" for DWC.

* * *

“Stop wiggling,” Krem demanded with a stern frown. 

Ellana huffed. Tried to adjust her seating. Puffed. “Just let me ride by myself!”

“Nope.”

She sat in front of Krem, astride his sturdy copper steed, in a saddle not designed to hold two people. Her leg was bandaged around the knee, blood already beginning to seep through the linens. The injury wasn’t really that bad. She’d slipped down the side of a hill (again) and skinned it on some sharp rocks on the way down. It looked far worse than it was, and would heal quickly provided infection could be avoided. Her Hart, Ser Winston squonked loudly behind them, his reins tied to Krem’s saddle.

“This is uncomfortable,” she complained. 

“Should have thought of that before you pitched yourself off a cliff.” Krem’s hands rested gently on her thighs, the reins wrapped around one palm as he kept a leisurely pace through the wilderness to keep them from being too jostled by the ride. 

“I didn’t ‘pitch myself’! I slipped!” She squirmed again, trying to arrange herself so Krem’s armor wasn’t poking her ass. 

“I distinctly heard you say ‘Hey, guys, watch this’, and then you were at the bottom of a ravine. Stop that wiggling.” His hands moved to hold her hips still, fixing her with another stern look. She glared up at him over her shoulder, but couldn’t keep the expression up when he leaned forward and nibbled at her nose.

“Stop!” she cried, giggling. The laugh that rumbled against her back was comforting, familiar. She leaned her head back against his shoulder and sighed. Tried to rearrange her legs. Failed, and sighed again.

“Hold still,” Krem murmured against her ear, low and husky. A chill ran down her spine, and she resisted the urge to squirm again, for a completely different reason. His hand slipped under her uninjured knee and carefully lifted it, shifting her so she rode to the side instead, one strong arm supporting her back. “Better?”

Ellana bit her lip hard, and it bloomed crimson. “You know how I am about my ears!” she scolded, red in the face as well. Actually, this was a bit more comfortable, or it would be if the Lieutenant would stop toying with her sensitive ears and getting her inappropriately bothered. 

Krem chuckled, lips still teasing at the tip of her ear. He bit it gently and she squealed, giving him a good slap on the arm. “Oh, I know about your ears, your worship…”

“Then stop!” She couldn’t keep her giggling held back as his breath played over the soft lobe, warm against her skin.

“Mmmm….” Another soft nip. “I don’t think so…” he whispered with a rakish grin.


	5. A Guy Who's Good With Kids

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> DWC prompt: The ladies love a guy who's good with kids.  
> I fully assert that Krem would be THE best daddy of all time.

Ellana watched from her seat at the fire as a gaggle of young elvhen children swarmed her boyfriend, begging to be swung. He had made the mistake of letting one young girl swing off of his arm, and now it seemed every little Lavellan wanted a turn. He took the hordes in excellent stride, giving them each a swing and laughing as they pawed at him. The little girls seemed especially enamored by him. A rather dreamy smile was settled over her features as she watched them play. 

“Not a bad view, is it?” Deshanna asked, following her gaze with a knowing eye.

Ellana breathed out a happy sigh. “I’m glad he’s getting along with the clan. I met his parents and his mother and I…” she grimaced. “We did _not_ get along.” 

The Keeper frowned, but kept silent on the matter. The opinions of a crotchety Tevene woman were hardly worth commenting on. One of the youngest girls had managed to charm Krem into carrying her around the camp. He joined the two women, grinning ear to ear.

“Having fun?” Ellana asked with a chuckle as he settled the child on his knee.

“Yes,” he laughed. “Not many kids at Skyhold.”

“You’re very good with the young ones,” Deshanna said with a pointed smile. “Have you any siblings?”

Krem shook his head. “Nah. Didn’t figure out I have a knack for kids until the boys and I got saddled babysitting an entire village of ‘em once. Some dunce apostate managed to turn all the adults into sheep. Half of us had to go round ‘em up and figure out a way to turn ‘em back…the rest of us stayed behind to keep the little ones safe.” He toddled the elvhen child easily on his knee, and Ellana beamed. 

“And do you expect any children in your future?”

“Er…”

Ellana spoke up quickly. “We haven’t discussed adopting any yet. A bit early for that…” she smiled at Krem and reached out to squeeze his hand. “But it’s good to know how well you’ve taken to it.”

He grinned at her and winked. “What can I say, ladies love a man who’s good with kids.”

The Inquisitor felt her cheeks color and looked down with a bashful giggle. 

Deshanna hadn’t lived as many years as she had without learning when her presence was superfluous. She took the child from Cremisius and excused herself politely, herding the crowd of children away from the young couple. 

Krem coughed into his fist, cheeks hot. “Well. Uh. This was eventful.”

Ellana leaned against him, let her head rest on his shoulder, her fingers twined together in the crook of his arm. “I love you,” she murmured.

He coughed again, a touch of pink darkening his cheeks. “I–I love you too…” He traced his thumb over her knuckles silently, resting his cheek in her soft hair. “So…you wanna go make a baby now?”

He laughed as she punched him in the side with a harmless fist. 

“I’m serious! OW! Not about _that_!” he groused. “I mean…do…d’you want to have a kid…? Adopt one? We could even find a–a donor? Or something? If you want…that…” 

Ellana silenced him with a finger to his lips, followed closely by her own. She cupped his cheek and held him close, kissing him long and sweet. “Right now, I want you,” she whispered with a small smile. “We can worry about everything else later.”

Krem touched their noses together and let a little sigh puff from his lips. “I love you…” he repeated. 


	6. A Home For Krem

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> DWC Prompt: "Stop being so cute"

Josephine had insisted that Krem have his own room in the Keep. Apparently being caught behind the barn or up in the hayloft with the Inquisitor five different times was five times too many. Initially, she’d given him a suite only slightly less expansive than Ellana’s, thinking he would enjoy the space and proximity to his paramour. He’d taken one look at it and asked if there wasn’t anything a bit smaller, scratching the back of his neck in embarrassment. It was a kind gesture, but far too much.

The room he’d chosen for himself consisted of a small area for sitting and dining, with a scrap basket for his sewing odds and ends and a modest bookshelf, a private tub hidden away behind a partition, a fireplace to warm the room and do a bit of cooking if he didn’t feel like dining in the great hall or the tavern, a rack for his armor and weapons, a small chest of drawers for his clothes, and a simple bed just big enough to fit two of him, leaving it quite a comfortable fit for one Krem plus one smallish Elvhen Inquisitor.  

Ellana had begun the nesting process immediately, showing up one evening with arms laden. She’d knit a rug to spread before the hearth, brought her favorite teacup and a large Dalish quilt, a box of books and her embroidery basket, her favorite stuffed nug (which Krem had made for her), along with a spare dress and chemise, several sets of breaches, and a truly absurd amount of knit socks, frilly smalls, and colorful tunics.

“So you’re moving in here, then?” he asked, quirking an amused eyebrow as he cleared a drawer for her.

“No,” she’d replied and left it at that.

He was glad for the quilt and the rug, however much he teased her nesting habits. The Frostbacks were quite aptly named. Krem leaned against the wall of his new home and watched as Ellana slipped about the room in stockinged feet, adding little touches of comfort wherever she deemed it lacking. He caught her around the waist when she swept by him and pulled her tight against his chest. She squeaked in surprise, but slipped her arms around him just the same, as if by instinct.

“Would you stop being so cute for one second?” He asked, rubbing their noses together. She giggled and angled her chin up, bouncing a little on the balls of her feet, silently demanding a kiss. Krem happily complied, pressing their lips together and immediately parting them with his tongue, cupping the back of her head with one hand, the other still draped casually around her waist. Coming up for air, he shot a quick glance to the bed in the corner with a mischievous grin. “You know, I’m gonna miss the hayloft…but I think this might be even better…”  She laughed as he pulled her toward the bed, then lifted her easily and flung her into the sheets, leaping in after her with a playful growl.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> DWC: “They’re so cute when they’re asleep.”   
> Characters and coffee shop AU from my other fic, Flat White No Sugar

Cullen bounced on the balls of his feet, trying to keep warm while Evelyn cursed and spat while fiddling with her keys. The light on the side of their building had gone out again, and it was the dead of winter. Finally, she got the key in the lock and turned it with a metallic shriek and they tumbled into the kitchen and shut the door behind them.

The television was on, he noticed as he began to peel off his gloves and coat. Evelyn had already shed her winter gear and was padding barefoot into the living room.

“Awww….gross….” she cooed, waving Cullen over. A smirk pulled his scarred lip up as he followed, peering over her shoulder at the couch. Lit by the flickering of an early Christmas movie Krem and Ellana were curled up together and asleep under a fluffy quilt. Her red hair was spilled out over Krem’s chest, head cradled safely in the crook of his arm, fingers twisted in the front of his shirt. He was sprawled out with one arm over his head, the other circling her waist protectively. His hair had been teased out of it’s normal slick style and strands were now sticking to his forehead.

Cullen glared. It wasn’t that he disliked Krem, in fact he happened to think he was a very upstanding young man. But he was generally opposed to the idea of anyone touching the younger sister of his– what was she actually? Girlfriend? Paramour? They’d never discussed it.

The dark-haired woman in question grinned up at him. “They’re pretty cute when they’re asleep, aren’t they?” she whispered.

Cullen grunted. Evelyn smacked at his chest. “Should he really be spending the night like this?” he asked.

“She’s a grown up,” she replied. A devilish grin spread her lips. “And so are we.”

The waggle of her eyebrows had him blushing, coughing into a fist. Krem gave a little groan in his sleep, turning on his side with Ellana still held carefully against him. Cullen’s honey-colored eyes darted between the two lovebirds on the couch and the way Evelyn swayed as she shifted her weight to one full hip. He grumbled, then grabbed her arm and started for the hallway leading to her room. 


	8. Locker Room Teasing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> General prompt from ma-sulevin: Teasing, dirty talking, and semi public sex for Krem/Ellana :)  
> Part of my Coffee Shop AU; Dalish and Skinner try to teach Ellana the basics of rugby. The results have Krem a little hot and bothered, so he drags her off to play an entirely different kind of game.

Krem watched his girlfriend with undivided interest, taking a slow sip of his coffee. 

Dalish and Skinner were attempting to teach her the basics of rugby, and she wasn’t quite getting it, but he didn’t mind. In fact, he was enjoying himself very much. Eyes that shone like carnelian in the chilly spring sun followed as Ellana was tackled, very gently, to the ground by a gleeful Dalish, both girls squealing and laughing. Krem shifted uncomfortably on the bleachers, avoiding the smirk Skinner was sending him. The Orlesian sauntered over to the giggling heap of elf and helped them both up. They reset their positions and this time all three of them ended up on the ground. Krem hid a grin in the palm of his hand, elbow planted on his crossed knees. Suddenly, he had a whole new appreciation for his favorite sport.

“Ah, El? Maybe you’d have better luck if you weren’t wearing a skirt?” he called down to the field.

She sat up, pushing fiery red hair out of her face and frowning. “I have stockings on.”

“That’s not…nevermind,” he trailed off. After a few more half-hearted attempts by his idiot friends to ‘teach’ Ellana, which left him with an uncomfortable warmth between his legs and a distinct suspicion that they were just using it as an excuse to grope his girlfriend, Krem stood and hopped down the bleachers to retrieve her. “Come on. We’ll be late for our movie.” Krem grabbed her hand, linking their fingers and tugging her away toward the locker rooms.

“But–”

“Bye, girls!” He waved to the other two elves as he hurried away, Ellana in tow. 

Skinner was still smirking. “Got a thing for elves, eh, Krem Puff?”

“I do _not_ –Oh, shut it!” he shouted, cheeks burning. Ellana giggled beside him.

* * *

“Krem, we’re not going to the movies tonight,” Ellana reminded him as he lead her into the locker rooms. He paused at his locker to fiddle with the combination, giving her a bashful grin.

“I know.”

“Then–” Her breath was knocked from her throat when Krem pushed her up against the cold metal, his body pressed hard against hers. She felt her heart speed up and color spring to her cheeks as she tilted her head back to meet his heavy gaze. His hands roamed her body with leisure, smoothing down her waist, over the lush curve of her hips. He nudged at her cheek with his nose and their lips met, soft at first, and then with fervor. He pushed her skirt further up her legs as he slowly went down on his knees before her, sliding against her as he knelt. She bit back a small moan, hands braced against the locker behind her.

Krem slid his palms flat up her fleshy thighs, fingers hooking in the elastic at her waist. He peeled her nylons down slowly, eyes devouring each pale inch of skin revealed as he tugged them down around her ankles. Once the dark fabric was pooled on the tile below them, he let his hands skim back up her legs, a bit of soft hair prickling his fingers as he went. When he reached the juncture between her thighs, an awed chuckle rolled through his chest. He rubbed his middle finger between her thighs, against the beginnings of a wet patch at the crotch of pristine, white cotton panties. 

“Naughty girl,” he scolded, affecting an offended look. “Getting all hot and bothered out there with my girls.”

“Th-that’s not–ah…” Ellana’s violet eyes drifted closed as he kept rubbing his fingers against her, switching to a gentle circular motion and back to long lateral strokes. There was a dull ring of metal as she let her head fall back against the locker. 

“You need to be reminded how good I can be to you, I suppose…” Krem mused with a put-upon sigh that whispered against her thighs. His tongue fluttered against the spreading wet spot and she inhaled a sharp gasp that turned into a quiet, shuddering moan. He kissed the tip of that little triangle of skimpy fabric, then dragged his tongue between her legs, pausing to scrape his teeth against quivering thighs. 

The elf put a hand over her mouth, heavily-lidded eyes darting toward the doors of the locker room. Each flash of Krem’s teeth made her squeak and twitch. With his fingers digging into the pliant flesh of her thighs, he tugged at the waistband of her panties with his teeth, then pulled them down at an agonizingly slow pace. Another exhale of awe left his chest and teased at the red curls between her legs. A long, glossy strand of fluid stretched from the swelling lips of her sex to the crotch of her underwear.

“Andraste’s ass…” he laughed breathlessly, toying with her wetness. “You really did enjoy yourself out there–ow!” Even with Krem’s clever, coppery fingers playing between her lower lips, Ellana still had enough presence of mind to kick him in the knee.

“It’s ‘cause of you, dumbass…” she muttered through a groan as he pushed further into her folds, grinning wide.

“Well, that’s damn nice to hear…” he chuckled, leaning forward to flick his tongue against her clit. She squeaked again, muscles jumping. His lips pulled gently at the little bud, while his tongue curled and dragged against it. A finger slid against her entrance and Ellana gasped again. One hand twisted in the smooth fabric of her skirt, the other still pressed against the locker for support. Krem pushed into her with a groan of his own, easily slipping two fingers into the slick, suffocatingly wet heat of her core. 

“Mmm…” She hummed a needy keen against her shoulder, watching him work through eyes misty with lust and love. “Oh, yes, Krem…y-you’re…you’re amazing…”

“I know,” he whispered against her, earning himself a light swat on the back of his head. His free hand left her leg and shot out to grab the wrist of the offending hand and pinned it to the locker with a crash. Ellana shivered and moaned louder than she’d meant to, knuckles going white as she clutched her skirt. Krem’s fingers twined together with hers against the cold metal and he went about his teasing work, sliding in and out of her and laving his tongue over her clitoris and labia. He pulled back to press wet kisses to her stomach, chin dripping with her slick, and his hand picked up the pace, palm slapping against her core with obscene, filthy wet noises. 

Her legs shook uncontrollably, hips grinding against his hand as she dragged short, rasping breaths into her lungs, head tossed back against the locker. Krem let his cheek rest against her stomach, looking up at her, eyes devouring her feverish cheeks, her moist lips dropped open in ecstasy. 

“Come on, sweetheart, come for me…” he whispered, pressing hot kisses to her navel, nuzzling against the warm, soft skin of her belly. Her chest heaved, eyes squeezed shut as she tried to restrain her cries. 

“Cremisius…” she whined, the tendons in her neck straining. He sighed against her, sucking a mark over the jut of her hip. “Krem…oh!” Her eyes shot open and her jaw dropped, a scream strangled in her throat. Krem increased his pace, curling his fingers into her. Her breaths came sharp, hard, fast, increasing in pitch until her hips gave a violent jerk and liquid gushed over Krem’s hand in a slow pulse as her walls contracted over him.

“Fuck, yes, El…” he gasped, adding teeth to his sweet kisses without ceasing the thrusts of his fingers. Her moans came in hoarse sobs now, nails digging into the back of his hand. “Oh yes, you’re such a good fucking girl…” He sealed his mouth over her pulsing sex, sucking at her with eager lips and swiping his talented tongue over her. A fresh wave of her orgasm overflowed his mouth and dripped down his chin and he grinned up at her. Her knees gave out and he gently pulled her into his lap as she slid down to him. Their hot cheeks pressed together, and she buried her face in his shirt, body curling tight around him. He stroked her hair and murmured against her ear as she trembled and shivered as the waves of her orgasm ebbed.

“Krem…” she whined against his neck. 

“Yeah, El?”

“You totally have a thing for elves…” groaned Ellana, laughing.

“I–shut up,” he dug his fingers into her stomach, chuckling as she screamed and slapped at him, limbs flailing. “Come on, let’s get you cleaned up…look at this mess you made.”

“YOU made!”

“Me?” Krem blinked at her with an innocent expression that shifted quickly into a rakish grin. “Never.”


	9. Payback

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt from Anonymous: 10. ‘we’re in a public place and i just spent the last half hour making you ridiculously aroused’ sex? KremxF!Inqy?
> 
> Cremisius is a little shit and Ellana is fed up.  
> So she bangs him.

Ellana glared across the war table with a dangerous glint in her eyes. Krem smiled innocently.

Apparently, he was ‘in the mood’. He had spent the majority of the day relentlessly teasing her, arching or wiggling his dark eyebrows at her suggestively, and generally being, well…

If she was honest with herself, it really didn’t take much. Being Krem was really all one needed to do to get her in the mood, so today’s behavior was really going above and beyond.

First, he had decided to practice with the pole arms out in front of the stables where she was grooming her Hart. In a sleeveless shirt. Sweat glistening on those toned biceps like polished bronze, plastering dark strands of hair to his forehead, the exercise bringing a rush of color to his face as he spun and twisted the pole with agile, skillful grace.

Later, he’d sat next to her at lunch, the tavern noisy and full, with one arm around her shoulders. Innocent enough, until he began skimming the tips of his fingers against her earlobe, then up to the twitching points of her ears and back down again. She’d shudder and shoot him an outrageous glance, only to have those clever fingers press into the knots in her shoulders as though he were doing nothing but giving her a harmless massage. Or he’d bend as though to whisper something to her, only to blow gently into her sensitive ears and sweep his lips across them.

Then he’d brazenly dipped his hand down the front of her breeches while they rode Ser Winston out on a scouting trip with Harding, his fingers toying with her wetness while she tried not to squirm or whine or otherwise draw attention to them. On the same trip, he’d also grabbed her breasts at nearly every opportunity, and her bottom, and her thighs, dragged his fingers through her hair, pulling just enough to frustrate her, and once even licked her ear from love to tip, stifling laughter when she gave a growling screech at the audacity.

Now, his leg was stretched out under the table, foot nestled between her legs, applying the most gentle of pressure against her. If she moved even the slightest bit, the friction would send waves of warmth shooting through every nerve, blood rushing to her cheeks. The bastard was putting on quite a show, as well. It was impossible to concentrate on the dull daily reports of her advisors while Krem kept licking his already moist lips, sucking his fleshy bottom lip between his teeth and letting it slide slowly free again, keeping his soft brown eyes locked with hers the whole time. She’d squirm, and he’d grin wickedly, pressing his foot more firmly against her.

Ellana couldn’t wait for this meeting to be over; so she could fuck him senseless and then probably kill him.

“Come with me,” she hissed at him as soon as the meeting was over. Cullen gave her an odd look when she grabbed the merc by the front of his shirt and dragged him bodily out into the courtyard.

“Your worship, what ever is the matter–” he teased, buttoning his lip when she whirled on him, amethyst eyes ablaze, and a tiny scowl on her pretty face.

She dragged him up a flight of crumbling stone stairs near the barracks, and into a tower room that was missing most of its outward walls, the entire roof, and quite a few floorboards. Harmless curls of ivy covered what remained of the floor as thick and tightly woven as a blanket. Ellana slammed the rickety door behind them and Krem peaked through one of the missing floor slats, then frowned.

“Isn’t this–”

“Yep.”

They were immediately above one of the barracks sleeping quarters. This time of the evening, it was fairly full.

“…kaffas…” the young Tevene muttered. Ellana pushed him hard, his fall graciously cushioned by ivy and moss.

“You want everyone to know about us?” She asked sweetly, pouncing on his belt. It came undone in her nimble fingers and was hurled across the room before Krem could choke back a gasp of nervous, elated laughter. “Fine. EVERYONE is going to know about us.”

He let her yank his breeches down around his ankles, then bit out a long moan when she skipped any further preamble and dove between his thighs. Her tongue danced over him, leaving behind licks of flame in her wake. She easily had his hips bucking up against her wet mouth within moments. Krem dug his teeth into his lips, willing himself not to cry out, still painfully conscious of the dozens of men milling about below.

That effort of will ended quite abruptly. A strangled cry jumped from his throat when her fingers slipped into him and hooked to press against that most sensitive spot inside. He rode against her hand, angling his hips up to meet her lapping tongue, his breath leaving him in shallow, whining puffs.

“Say it,” she hissed against his swollen sex. He moaned, but shook his head, then growled when her mouth moved away and her fingers paused their wet plunges. “You don’t get to come until you do,” she reminded him with another saccharine smile.

Krem glared, lips pouting. One hand shot out and dragged her down to a sharp, crushing kiss. His tongue parted her lips easily, and he devoured her comfortable moans before they parted with an obscene, wet pop.

“Fuck me, your worship,” he growled, and Ellana grinned.

“Louder,” she whispered, flexing her fingers. Her tongue darted out against the hardened bud between his legs, and his back arched as his head dropped against the soft foliage covering the floor.

“Fuck!” He cried. Ellana’s pace quickened, and her mouth sank down over him. “Fuck, yes, Inquisitor! Ahh…Maker, FUCK!” A string of Tevinter curses rasped from his throat as she worked him through his orgasm, her fingers striking loud, sopping wet chords against him. All the faint sounds of living below had gone piercingly silent. Krem lay on his back, panting open mouthed as the little elven woman clambered onto his lap and leaned down to kiss him. His fingers buried in her soft red hair, pulling her against his chest as he flipped them over, pillowing the back of her head in his hands.

He brushed soft, gentle kisses across her cheeks, then gave her a rakish grin. “Time to start screaming my name, your worship…” Krem said, dangerously quiet as he bent to kiss her again.


End file.
